February 1998
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Alas, it's not the way Fiona presents herself to the media but
the way the media presents Fiona Apple to us that causes such
sheep like reactions . . . "I love Fiona" or "Fiona sucks".
Actually she's just another music-biz-immature artist suffering
from mega-buck exposure. The greedheads make their pot of cash,
she gets the fame (whether she wants it or not) and we should
make up our own own minds. Never give into peer pressure, think
for yourself, feel for yourself, be yourself ! As for this
site, it depends on whether you want it to be a humourous
antidote to sycophantic Fiona-fans or an active focus for
hatred. . . . I hope the former applies.
Editors' Note : It is a satirical site designed for people
who already think Ms Apple is full of wastewater... we aren't
psychopathic killers or anything.
This page is really nice , I even read some stuff about Fiona I
did not know!!
Thanks!!
you are entitled to your opinion, and i'm not going to sit here
insulting you because our opinions on fiona apple are
different, but if you want this to be an appreciated and
frequently-visited site, you'd better improve it. honestly man,
this page is weak. i was expecting a lot more. i don't think
you have made a very good case for why someone should be so
"anti-fiona."
~*fhw*~
Editors' Note : Thanks for the post. We appreciate any
constructive criticism you may have... sorry that this site
isn't as brilliantly cynical as one would expect... we're not
the "I Hate Brenda Newsletter" quite yet. But this is a work in
process, so don't think this is all we're ever going to have
here. Once again, thanks for the mature suggestions (take heed,
other people who can't form complete thoughts).
Personally, I think Fiona's music is absolutely wonderful (at
least you don't criticize that). But i do agree that she seems
a little bit wacko in the media. The other comments in your
guestbook about Fiona's apperances are really lame, though.
Yeah yeah, so you think she's a druggy anorexic bitch, you're
so originial. I think she's too skinny but so are a lot of
people. Get over it. Apperances aren't everything (wow!)
Actually I thought the page was very welll done, for a hate
page. I enjoy Fiona's music, but that doesn't mean everyone has
to. So I guess what I'm saying is that this page really does
kick ass. I'm getting confused by myself and the voices have
started speaking to me again. BYE!!!
I had planned on an irate response, but your lack of
journalistic skills and poor webmanship pretty much stand on
their own. I think anyone with enough time on their hands to
make a Fiona "hate" page needs to get a few more hobbies. Fiona
makes wonderful music, and you don't have to like her.
Editors' Rebuttal : Well, we're not journalism majors and
we never claimed we were the best webmasters on the planet, but
thanks for reminding us that "we don't have to like her" -
after all, that's why we're here, is it not ?
FIONNA SHOULD BE SHOT WITH AN APPLE IN HER CROTCH!
hey! this page is awesome. but shouldn't hanson be added to
it?
It's about time someone was brutally honest about what they
think of Ms. Apple, that pretentious, little sack of bones.
You're definately not alone. She may write and sing well, but
she otherwise needs to keep her trap shut!
P.S. I hold the belief that no one should be judged by their
appearence, but turkeys, "beautiful birds." You've gotta be
kiddin' me! Fiona probably doesn't eat turkey because the dry
meat is too hard to regurgitate.
Dear Webmaster,
Finally, it's about time someone made an anti-Fiona site! I'm
so sick of this little, 20-year old "victim" who openly flaunts
her eating disorder-heroin abused body, drug use and depression
and who uses 50 cent words just to make herself sound smart. In
all her lovely little pictures she tries to look oh-so-
depressed so people will feel sorry for her, not to mention she
looks super-stoned! Number of pictures of Fiona in her album:
lucky 13. I mean, her album cover is of her FACE. Turn it
around, another picture of her face. Another attention getting
technique.
I'm amazed at how much of her personal life she puts on the
line in her interviews, and then seems surprised at the
negative feedback she gets in return. She tells interviewers
her sad, sad story, complete with pychiatric medication (is she
like, proud of it or something?) and therapy tales of feeling
alienated. Well, guess what? She isn't the first person who's
parents got divorced, she isn't the only person who's gotten
raped, and I wouldn't want to be friends with her, cuz she
would probably give out my phone number to an interveiwer so he
could call me and ask about Fiona, like she did in the
Rollingstone article.
There's nothing wrong with wanting attention, but the
attention Fiona is requesting is a little too much. FIONA, IF
YOU ARE READING THIS, YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT WHEN YOU OPENLY
EXPRESS YOURSELF, IT WON'T NECESSARILY BE GOOD! And the music
she makes isn't innovative, I mean, what's new about using the
piano? Maybe she's trying to be like the mighty Tori Amos, who
was one of the first people to become associated with using a
piano in pop oriented songs (that's from this decade). And
what's up with those undereye circles? And I'm getting sick of
seeing that damn navel ring under those teenie shirts (oh my
God, she has a piercing!) Fiona's sickening attempts at being
"extra special" are annoyinh and make her less special.
Fiona, if you take so much pride in honesty, here's some
honesty: you are a fake, who sells your story to compenste for
lack of talent and you are a sellout to society, despite what
you say.
Thanks again for the site. :) Live on Nirvana, Nine Inch
Nails, Tori Amos, Ani DiFranco, Prodigy, David Bowie, Garbage,
and Bush. Have a nice day.
Ooohhh, I love the song "Criminal," but I don't know anything
else about her except what you have put on this page. You have
enlightened me. I love her more now than ever before! Thanks
Man!!
here's the deal with fiona, in criminal, she seems to be
crawling out of a couch, which doesn't surprise me, I mean
there was probably a needle down there. anyway the chick is a
freak, she looks like a zombie and it sounds like she ripped
off the age old jingle "there's a hole in the wall, where the
men can see it all." so she deserves to be shot, right in the
forehead, i want to see that little trickle of blood, then the
real convulsing can start by the tawny haired brat.
Shit, it's about time somebody came out with an anti-Apple
page. If I hear "Shadowboxer" or "Criminal" one more time, I
think I'll have to stick needles through my eardrums just to
end my own auditory suffering. I wonder, does Ms. Apple realize
that when she goes on one of her crusades, such as the
"no-turkeys-for-Thanksgiving/basted-in-blood" PETA shit, it
makes people like me want to send a personal check to the
turkey farmer's association just to piss her off.
Last Modified : 1st April 1998
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